Where to begin....

Its been a week since I have posted and my mood overall is frustration, so I will just ramble out a bunch of thoughts I am having.

The thanksgiving holiday was remarkable to say the least. Thurs was hot and my buddies and I golfed in the morning and then had thanksgiving and football at a friends house all day. Friday everyone made it out in oldtown and had a blast. I got a terrible hang over but still went to megan and brady's place for a friends type of thanksgiving.

Everyone was drinking and having a blast, and we just sit around and talk about life issues and are all very open; its refreshing.

I have been playing a TON since my last update and had things going but went on tilt badly one day dropping 8k at 3/6 and 5/10 plo. Then the worst thing possible happens a super soft 2 tables on stars 25/50 plo open up and i watch for a bit and plan on sitting. I have a bet with a friend to not play that high and i messaged him and took the bet off and hopped in.

Today rolls around and I am frustrated from the losing but have gained back 4k and ready to grind, and my friend text me asking me about our no 25/50 bet(this is a diff friend who i totally forgot we had this bet with). I wasnt playing and sneaking around this bet and now I have to shell out this money it makes me absolutey sick.

I played a bunch more hands today and lost a touch and am up like 500$ on the month. I simply have to have leaks. The games are soooo tight the win rates just plummet and frustration can set in. I have battled back nicely from being stuck big two sessions in a row which is a plus.

Money has been flying out of my accounts at such a rapid rate this year I just dont even know what to do with myelf. I have cut back alot and really am starting to grind. Babysteps toward a 20k month is all I can do at this point, I think I may also lock up some more money here at the end of the year that I can't touch.

I just need to get into winning ways, and the best players are still winning so I know it can be done.

I cannot wait for december so then I can see my family at home and have one treat of a new years trip before I start a new year(which is sounds cliche, but I need a fresh start).

Oh also I own a % of a W$ trading business and stars just converted all W$ to T$ which essentially makes a business a bust moving forward.

My friends, and most of all my girlfriend really keep me going through the tough times like this.

One positive note is I have a % of a person playing a big fish on UB and hes really taking it to him hope he can get the last of his $$$, if not oh well he made a great run.

So essentially I lost focus through stretches of playing, and need to continue to play war inside my mind to stay strong.

Josh